Halloween...Boo!

I was raised with American Northeast Halloween style. I went to a tiny Catholic school and learned a Halloween song from the nuns. I dressed in a home-made princess (young child) or witch (older child) costumes. I went trick-or-treating with my brother and friends. We would sing a song to get a treat, and no I never personally did tricks (although I can't vouch for my brother or friends.)

As an adult I wandered west and away from the Catholic Church. Before I headed back to both, I had some time to learn a few things about how others lived their values, with Halloween as an example. I had never given Halloween much thought but being a brand new mommy gave me incentive to think, because like my peers, we wanted to do right by our young children keeping gentleness in mind. I became friends with many intense and thoughtful people...no sheep here. Some friends were liberal secular thinkers. Their beliefs were well-intentioned, thoughtful, and interesting. Halloween was out because it was unsophisticated, too dark, and it bought into our superficial culture. I became friends with many conservative faithful thinkers. Their beliefs were well-intentioned, basic, and passionate. Halloween was out because it was "the work of the devil." I wrestled with Halloween, feeling both confused and apathetic. You see, Halloween wasn't my favorite holiday as a child. I didn't like much candy, I was very shy, and I didn't like scary things. Skipping Halloween altogether had some appeal. Yet, it my memory it was a simple day that was fun and sweet. Nothing more...nothing less.

Once back in the Church, I realized that I had absorbed a very Catholic perspective on Halloween. For a child and adult who never cared much for Halloween, I now found myself defending it, much to my surprise. Within the context of Halloween/All Saints/All Souls day, Halloween make sense. The trick (no pun intended) is to not make it more or less than it is. It isn't a holiday that deserves weeks of planning, decorating, and celebrating. It doesn't need to be about money, gore, and evil. It isn't a holiday that needs to be ignored or rejected because this gives it too much power.

Each year looks different for our family. This year our family will decorate our home outside in classic spooky style. Some of us will trick-or-treat while others stay home with littles and hand out treats from our home. We will dress up in classic and original style...princesses, pirates, witches, clowns, spooky guys, cowboys, Lord of the Rings, Teenage werewolf from the 50's, hippy, animals, hobos, and more. Our boys will spend much of their time at a neighbor's home who does an exceptional job of decorating his garage as a haunted house, scary enough for bigger kids and adults while tame enough on one side for littles. When every thing is over, the children will dump their candy on the table and swap with each other for favorites. We'll put some away for Christmas stockings. I'll make some spiced cider and serve Halloween cookies. Tomorrow morning we'll get up early and take down all the decorations and pack them away for next year. Sweet.

Next? Bring on the great stuff. Let All Saints, All Souls, and the month of remembering our dead, begin.

Rule of 6

When Mary G. posted an invitation to describe our family's Rule of 6, I thought this would be a fun opportunity to look at our family priority list from a fresh angle. Here's goes!

1. Pray.
2. Grow in Catholic virtue and culture.
3. Meet personal care needs.
4. Build positive relationships.
5. Work hard on meaningful skills and services.
6. Immerse in and discuss all encompassed by Philippians 4:8.

Thinking in terms of daily use of a Rule of Six, the biggest perk is to be satisfied and grateful at the end of each day with what is accomplished. I can look at all that is done and objectively see what does and doesn't fit with our family priorities. What does fit is worthy of our time, even if it wasn't on the schedule or didn't quite turn out as planned. For me and our family, this is so much better than trying to prove personal discipline through sticking to a planned schedule or feeling a constant failure for not sticking with a planned schedule. Also, I can isolate what doesn't fit, giving our family infinite opportunities to work on our weak areas.

A Rule of 6 can also be used in broader ways. Most recently we used our family priority list to help discern our decision to do high school at home. Our list of five priorities could, and should, be expanded to include...

Priority Six: Immersion and Discussion in Whatever...

How can we help her to grow in the spirit of Philippians 4:8? How can we help her to immerse herself in whatever is true, honorable, just, pure, lovely, gracious, excellent, and praise-worthy? How can we help her to enjoy, think about, discuss, and produce projects about these things?

Thank you, Lissa and Mary. It has been helpful and enjoyable to think about these things with you!